Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Stroke of Insight and Cool Sad Songs

Just read "My Stroke of Insight" by Jill Bolte Taylor, PhD. What an amazing book. She talks on Tedtalk here.
The summary from Ted is:

Speakers Jill Bolte Taylor: Neuroanatomist


Brain researcher Jill Bolte Taylor studied her own stroke as it happened -- and has become a powerful voice for brain recovery.

.Why you should listen to her: .One morning, a blood vessel in Jill Bolte Taylor's brain exploded. As a brain scientist, she realized she had a ringside seat to her own stroke. She watched as her brain functions shut down one by one: motion, speech, memory, self-awareness ...

Amazed to find herself alive, Taylor spent eight years recovering her ability to think, walk and talk. She has become a spokesperson for stroke recovery and for the possibility of coming back from brain injury stronger than before. In her case, although the stroke damaged the left side of her brain, her recovery unleashed a torrent of creative energy from her right. From her home base in Indiana, she now travels the country on behalf of the Harvard Brain Bank as the "Singin' Scientist."

"How many brain scientists have been able to study the brain from the inside out? I've gotten as much out of this experience of losing my left mind as I have in my entire academic career."

Jill Bolte Taylor

I'm not sure why, but this book about her experience, above all yogic insights, above all other books I have read lately, this book really HELPED me. I mean, I'm-angry-and-screaming-inside-and trying-to-scream-outside-at-my-beloved-J-and-not-knowing-why-and-no matter-what-I-can't-stop-and-I feel-out-of-control-and-helpless-even-after-years-of-different-therapies-and-drugs..., HELPED me.

It's only been a day of trying her techniques. But the difference is that she is solely based on the body and its capabilities in her advice. No foo-foo, no God, no bullshit. Yet she can talk elegantly about Energy and Healing and not be foo-foo. She is speaking my language. The science of what we don't know. The experience of energy as something real and tangible. It really gives me hope that I can heal this anger inside me. Change my future. At last.

And now a totally random quote from this sad song I like by Of Monsters and Men called "Little Talks".

I don't like walking around this old and empty house

So hold my hand, I'll walk with you my dear

The stairs creak as I sleep, it's keeping me awake

It's the house telling you to close your eyes



Some days I can't even trust myself

It's killing me to see you this way


This song really lets me see the big picture. How I treat J and how much I would miss him if I was old and alone in our old house. Thinking of all the words I said to him, and wishing I had been more kind and loving. It makes me sad, but also is a reminder. It's beautiful in its duality.


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